you were crying and the really sympathetic homeless man offered you a sip of his whiskey. who was i to stop you?
Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
Did you really just text me at 6:35 in the morning asking where the condoms were? I moved out a year ago.
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
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