Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
Is there a zoo near here? I need to see some penguins like right now..
I am not bailing you of of jail
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
Randomize
