Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
His dick is hereby named Charles Dickens. Will's is less cerebral. I'd like to call it Pinnacle like the vodka we drank when we hooked up, but I feel like that's a compliment it doesn't deserve.
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
They don't have a Valentines Day card for the married guy I'm sleeping with. It can't use the words, love, soulmate, you're the only one for me...and obviously it can't be anything related to spending the day together because that's not happening.
Randomize
