nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
You're the only guy I know who could convince a lady at the pharmacy to trade you her pain pills for your antibiotics.
Drunk is a universal language darling
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
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