I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
do you know why i have a volvo grill taped to the back of my car?
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
Come see our sink grown plant.
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
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