Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
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