As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
I told my boyfriend my favorite food was strawberry poptarts, now my email inbox is getting spammed with nude pics of him with his dick in a poptart box..
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
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