How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
i wish my penis had a tongue
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
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