Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
Too much gin, very little bucket
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
The beer is more important than you right now.
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
Why did I wake up in bed with the ironing board and a Mariah Carey mask? Vodka hates me
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Randomize