everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
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