Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
her vagina looked like bernie madoff
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
To the person who left a cup of vomit in the bathroom: I commend you for your aim but you are dead to me- not an ideal birthday present.
I'll wind up on his doorstep with a confused "oh you live here" expression, a feigned ankle injury and a seemingly fortunately placed bottle of tequila. I don't care what it takes: HIS MOUTH WILL BE ON MOUTH.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
I lost the right to judge tonight
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
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