I'm pants shitting drunk right now
This cookie i'm eating tastes like pizza. It was so worth contacting my sister for pot.
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
Don't EVER smell your tampon
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
Randomize
