Your tits are I can't wait for
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
You guys I wore sweatpants to work today because I simply forgot to put on real pants and I had a weed brownie and a juice box for breakfast. I am not ready for parenting.
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
I am at the car wash dressed as a turn of the century librarian
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
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