take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
As girls, Bert & Ernie are not very bangable costumes. At least not by who we'd want to get banged by.
I was kidding. But I promise you I'd still find us the most eligible bangables, even if we dressed up like a dumpster and a prom night baby.
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize