does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
There r osticjed everywhere
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
In preparation for st patty's day I finally had a shamrock shake, and I invested in an app that will apparently keep me from drunkenly texting you pictures of my tits this weekend. Please let me know if you want to not be put on the "forbidden" list!
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
dropping lines from Workaholics has slowly become my icebreaker when hitting on girls. who would have thought "lets get weird" would cause girls to actually get weird
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
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