we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
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