covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
3pm strippers are depressing
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
Randomize
