Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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