Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
This baby is an asshole
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
I wanted sex but got Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, instead. Then I had to drive 30 minutes home wet. Worst booty call, ever.
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
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