Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
Yeah, surprised you made it on time this morning. Remarkable, considering 2 hours ago you were pretending to be talking window curtains.
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
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