And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
Ben affleck wants to be a US senator. Just thought you would puke with me
phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
are you just going to ignore any texts involving my penis from now on? because thats going to shut down a pretty sizeable portion of our conversations.
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
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