I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
The gym has a pool
my gym membership just went from "way to get in shape" to "place to go swim when I'm high"
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
I won't apologize to a one balled man
When you can pee with one hand accurately while texting, you drink too much.
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
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