Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
when she started singing "you look better when im drunk" to my cat i realized it was time to take her home
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
I'm basically the yoda of knowing when someone wants to sleep with you
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
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