Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
i broke my thumb. i no longer have 2 opposable thumbs. i'm sub-human. i love vicodin.
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
Help me help you realize you are a moron
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
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