Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
It's Friday. Sex?
i just saw a man dusting the fake palm trees at the mall
...welcome to nebraska
It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
Randomize
