Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
Randomize
