all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
Randomize
