therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
Randomize
