im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
You spilled spaghetti on the floor, and kept telling the noodles to "settle down" as you tried to clean it up
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
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