You were right. It hurts to walk today.
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
Houston, we have a squirter
I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?
shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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