I don't think brook has ever known best
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
Well my sober pact lasted almost an hour. Then I did four shots. But in other news, one of those shots I took with a midget. So like I couldn't turn that shit down.
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
I just handed a girl a slice of pizza and she handed me her number. Is this how Vegas hookups normally begin?
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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