somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
Randomize
