And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
Randomize
