So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
So I figured out why that guy from Tinder stopped messaging me back. He got married.
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
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