I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
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