I smell stomach acid.
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
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