She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
people are starting to question the shark bite story
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
Ugh hungover at a laundromat is a terrible feeling. For some reason I keep getting sucked into staring at the clothes spinning around and around and it makes me want to profusely projectile vomit everywhere
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize
