I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
His name isnt in my phone as “Satan’s spawn” for no reason. #devildick
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
My orgasm happened in two different decades
Randomize
