Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
My EX’s roommate heard about the breakup and offered to help me bang it out. I think she hates her even more than I do.
Randomize
