It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
I'm in that stage of denial where I hope our kids have his nose.
You do realize that you broke up with him, right?
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
Randomize
