So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
I'm sitting alone in a bar pretending to watch football because I don't know where the liquor store is around here and I'll be god damned I'm going to be sober on my day off.
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
Randomize
