I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
Randomize
