brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
Oh wow. I almost tweeted #TweetFromTheBackOfACopCarTuesday but I didn't think it was that appropriate
Randomize
