In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
Hungover/still slightly drunk at work. Opened a bag of cheese with a box cutter. Pretty sure I need stitches.
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
Randomize
