He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
Jelly. This is your "are you still alive" text. Any response will do.
Hey I found a cat!
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
Randomize
