I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
We were hooking up and you crawled into bed with us, because you had lost your phone and didn't "want to be alone at a time like this."
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
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