she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
Remember when we used to go to the bathroom to do drugs together? Now it's to help you with your spanx.
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
Randomize
