So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
your brother just told me that Guinness is the first book of the Bible...
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
As girls, Bert & Ernie are not very bangable costumes. At least not by who we'd want to get banged by.
I was kidding. But I promise you I'd still find us the most eligible bangables, even if we dressed up like a dumpster and a prom night baby.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
