those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
I never want to see another naked old woman again.
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
