Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
Randomize
