Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
the black eye was caused by a 12 year old girl in a vampire costume who punched you in the face after you aggresively screamed "TEAM JACOB!" in her face & howled at the moon...
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
I was about to share my drunken story from the weekend, but two friends getting married and one finding out she's pregnant makes Saturday in jail look a little suspect.
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Randomize
