She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
Do you know how awkward it is to call the bar from last night and ask if they found my leggings?
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
Hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking you had a pulse
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
Randomize